All great and powerful things in life have been both feared and revered. In the past, a bleeding woman has been both ostracised and used to bless the lands. She has been sent to sacred places to rest or seperated from society in particular houses so she does not come into contact with men.

Even some of our words originate from the female hormonal cycle. Lunatic comes from the lunar implications of madness and it’s link with the female cycle which was once govenered by the moon (and still is for some). Hysteria originates from hystera meaning uterus. It was once believed that the womb moved about the body causing trouble in different places in a womans life. With the 1960s and the invention of ‘the pill’ we saw a sexual revolution as women were free to have sex without worrying about getting pregnant. Now in our modern lives hormonal contraceptives are the norm and periods are generally shunned as an inconvience.

We are constantly told about the many products which we can use to help control this ‘inconvenience’. A great example of this is the fairly recent tampax advert in which “mother nature” comes to visit at the most inconvenient of times.. a fashion shoot! Because we all know that a woman can’t possibly be out in a public space whilst bleeding….

I find this advert interesting because the woman in it is portrayed as being out in the public eye, she is being watched by the cameras, she is being witnessed at her (presumably) most beautiful. A fashion shoot is something most women are taught, by general media, to aspire to. To be beautiful enough to be photographed is portrayed as the ultimate achievement for a woman and seen clearly in this advert.

Another thing of interest to me is the woman portraying ‘the period’ in the advert. She is old and dressed in a 1950s style suit. The 1950s is a time period which we now view most stereotypically for its submissive house wives (something we like to think we have aspired past as our only destiny as women in the modern age). This woman is also referred to as ‘mother nature’ which smacks to me of obvious connotations of the negative slant placed upon nature and mothers in our modern age.

We currently live in a world in which the natural forces are seen as something to power through and we are surprised when, for instance, a previous flood plane, which has been developed for property purposes is then flooded again and everything is destroyed. This uncontrollable force which was once revered as mother nature is now feared. This would not be the case if we would take the time to work with her rather than against her; Holland is a great example of a nation which has seen the logic in doing this as they are well aware of the risks they take by living in an area of the world beneath sea level.

Returning to the matter at hand; lets not forget that periods are a healthy by-product of NOT getting pregnant. However, they are often viewed as a negative sign of the woman’s fertility and this, in turn, is seen as a threat to the sexual virility of those having sex who do not wish to become pregnant. The best cure for this would be to take a hormonal contraceptive which eradicates that, oh so troublesome, period.

However, what modern society has forgotten is that the period is just one part of a larger fertile cycle. The hormones, which are so commonly seen simply as the cause of our aches and pains, stress and emotional turmoil, are forgotten about for their creative, outgoing, celebratory and ecstatic influences. This is the fact of the matter. The hormones give us our pleasure AND our pain. A hormone which gives us much pleasure is oxytocin, which is released after sex and giving birth, influences an open heart, bonding and triggers the release of endorphins which are more effective than morphine as a pain killer and just as good as MDMA (ecstasy) at influencing an ecstatic state of mind.

Without the ebb of my period I would not have the build of my sexuality, my creativity, my fire for life, my passions each month. When my period comes, it comes silently, quietly, peacefully but only when I have respected the rest of my cycle by behaving the way my body required me. When I bleed I experience some physical pain and tension but when this time is respected it treats me much more kindly. It beckons me to take peaceful time to myself. A day off work, a day with little speaking, a day of less activity, a day of smiles and light food. Sometimes I feel more sensitive and so I am sure to surround myself with pleasurable things like long baths, fires and calming teas. Each woman is different and each deserve their own rituals. In the wonderful book ‘the red tent’ the women go to a special tent to sped this time together. It is crucial we make our own red tents, even if these are found only in our minds and hearts.

Soon I will be adding an article about the physical effects of the FULL hormonal cycle and hope this will help you to respect your cycle more too. It’s an on-going learnign experience for us all to enjoy, fear and revere.

Both of us shape our realities with our will only to different ends. But on this matter it is not the product but the process which matters and unites us. For we are both magicians; strong of heart and mind. Although we may never meet, although we might not touch; our connection is undeniable. Our dance is intimate though distant. For we are night and day, hot and cold, love and hate. And we shall always be one.

Beltane Blessings

Dedicated to Meg and Graham on their special day x

Today I have taken my morning rituals outside. A walking meditation to start the day, listening for the voice of Divine. Freshly cut nettles sit in my basket surrounded with the soft scent of new growth. The new growth within myself is tangible as I look across the landscape toward the Summer and my future plans.

A woman has joined me on my hill today to witness spring in action. It is remarkable how much space is needed in natural settings to feel alone and just how little you get in a city. I think of all the other souls rushing around in their cars and know that at least a part of them is sat on this hill with me, contemplating spring.

Happiness is not measured by the amount of days you lived but by the amount of days you can remember. May this be one for you.

All that said, my favourite thing about you is how little I know you. I have no idea how you like your tea, and it’s glorious. As long as I don’t think about it too closely, the idea of learning about you is exhilarating. You make the idea of travelling down that familiar road seem somehow new. There’s so much to discover, but it feels like an adventure rather than a chore You’re all potential and promise: every new details is exotic and striking, every piece of family history an unearthed relic, every anecdote some glamorous story.

There are things about you that I do know. I was scared of you at first. You seemed so self-possessed. I’d find myself withering under your gaze, like you could see straight through me. To be honest, you seemed cold. It was as if you’d already decided that I had nothing of interest to offer. My fear became a self-fulfilling prophecy: everything I said would collapse out of my mouth and die.

I’m not sure how things changed, but somewhere along the way they did. It was like a sea-change. I discovered I could make you laugh. Your eyes crease up and you forget yourself for a second. It’s really rather lovely. I like that you’re pretty awkward. You’re probably more awkward than me, actually. I’ve realised that what I was scared of was actually bluster. It’s exciting – like knowing a secret. I feel I’ve seen something in you that most people would miss, something tender and thoughtful.

Of course, I’m aware that getting to know you properly will turn you into a regular person, filled with all the contradictions and complexities that will bring understanding but take away enchantment. It’s not a bad thing. Really knowing a person either replaces giddiness with something deeper, or replaces it with nothing at all If it turns out to be the latter, well, I’m okay with it.

It’s worth the risk. For now, I just enjoy you being in my life. I get excited when I see your name in my inbox, or when you enter a room. There’s a sense of possibility that courses through our every conversation like an electric current. Who’s to say what will happen next? Maybe we’ll get talking one random evening, the hours passing unrecognised as we finish a bottle of wine together and end up wandering the streets like teenagers, feeling ten feet tall. Anything seems possible. It’s not that I’m expecting anything to happen between us, but what’s quietly thrilling is knowing that it might.

Another thing I know about you is that you’re reading this right now. Of that I’m pretty certain. I hope the idea of that gives you pause and makes you wonder if I’m writing about you. And then, gosh, just for a second, just for a moment or two, I hope that you find yourself hoping that this is about you. Because let me tell you, oh splendid, maddening person, it is. Hi.”

By Jason Ward
from issue eight of Oh Comely

This magazine is an inspiration to me always.

Waris Dirie is a name which should go down in history alongside Rosa Parks for being a woman that stood up and did what was right to change our future for the better.

She lived a simple life as a nomad one day running from everything she knew into a world unknown with only herself as a tool for survival. She adjusted from a third world country to the culture of the western world with no one to support her. No man, no money, no skills, no words in some cases.

From nomad to a member of the UN. I would like to promote her cause; that of illegalising female genital mutilation.

This practice is one of deep cultural and religious belief. It is practiced so the females of a society are physically unable to sleep around. In the best case, only the clitoris is removed, in the worst the labia also, which is then sewn together to seal the entrance to the vagina leaving a tiny hole far smaller than natural through which to piss and bleed.

In Waris’ case she was maimed in a desert with an old razor blade by a woman who travelled to perform the atrocity, with no anaesthetic she was held down by her mother while this woman carved through her genitalia. She did not run, she knew this was her passage into womanhood, left alone in the desert by the removed parts of her body to heal she became septic. Bound so she could not move she endured the wound alone in the most part, visited by her mother to feed her.

Later in life Waris had this barbaric practice reversed and her vagina was opened once again. For the first time she could piss full flow without pain and could release her period blood without passing out in pain as it flowed back into her pelvis.

The saddest part is that Waris is one of the lucky ones. Each year millions of women are at risk of FGM and many die in the desert alone from such barbarities. Much work is being done to illegalise these practices and many outreach programmes have been implemented to educate the cultures in which this is practised to inform them of the health risks involved.

If you wish to follow this further please forward this article to others, look at www.unfpa.org and www.desertflowerfoundation.org I would highly recommend the book Desert Flower by Waris Dirie. She is an inspiration to all (and its only 200pages long!).

I am often told that I should go travelling, that it would be good for me and I would love it. It is ever so popular lately that my ego rejects the idea on the basis that I don’t like doing things everyone else does! I have no doubt that it would expand my mind as all experiences do but you have to wonder, exactly how good is all this travelling for the planet?

I read an article a while ago in the Resurgence magazine which told about how our incessant need to pilgrimage to sites of spiritual awakening has led to many sacred sights being irrevocably damaged.

This habit of travelling for wisdom reminds me of the Buddhist who needs isolation in a monastery to maintain his vows and peace of mind. The real challenge is surely to be a monk in the city? Pushing a 9-5 with the rest of us. Not only is it a challenge but it is a life affirming lesson in individuation.

So, you went travelling? How long did your new found mentality last? How long before you wondered when you could go travelling again to feel that way once more?

I believe that not only does our habitual travelling for wisdom erodes our planet but it also erodes our ability to find the lessons in our daily life and hold these experiences in the light (a phrase used often by Quakers to mean seeing the divine in everything). It supports an idea that the things worth seeing aren’t right under your bloody nose! Why does something moving have to happen in another country? Why does something expand our mind only when it is totally foreign to us? What about the wonderful subtleties found in the strangers on a train? What of the changeable weather and sunsets?

To associate foreign worlds with spiritual wisdom is to further justify the basic disconnect we have in the western world with our true wishes, desires, hopes and dreams. All of which have been scewed to suit a society that pushes everyone to early graves due to over indulgence and broken hearts.

So please, don’t go travelling for wisdom before you can see the divinity beneath your nose.

Namaste

Well, I’ve been far too busy to write something in time for Winter Solstice but I have some time free on Christmas eve thank goodness!

My house is filled with free decorations this year as I don’t have any money. I’ve covered a branch with glitter, collected a tonne of pine cones for around the house and trailed the mantle piece with yew, pine cones and holly. There’s even the odd bits of Ivy around. All these plants remind me that not everything dies during winter. It brings in the lushness of the evergreens and reminds me that Spring will come again.

Winter solstice in the shortest day and longest night. As such it is often during this time that many suffer depression for some reason. Often because of seasonal affective disorder but often this time of year, which is so stereotypically about the bringing together of people, highlights the loneliness some of us feel. Unfortunately we have record levels of suicide and divorce at this time of year. So while our days seem dark our minds also have this dark tendency. This Christmas Eve happens to be a dark moon, a time for introspection as well which will strengthen the lonely vibes for some.

However, while all this darkness is about it is our jobs to remember the light. Many of our Christmas practices derive from this aim. The evergreen plants we bring in reflect light and remind us of the coming sun. We also light candles or fairy lights in the darkness. Just as we should remember that the darkest of nights is followed by increasingly long days our lonely times will be followed with joys. It is only through experiencing these darker moments can we truly treasure the happier times. So even if you spend Christmas alone this year, just remember there is always light around the corner. Be Merry wherever you may be and whoever you are with, even if it be yourself, because at the end of the day; Miserable People Miss Life.

The Female Eunuch is a classic in Feminist literature. Written in 1970 it was a break through and very influential in its time. But what of it now?

Interestingly, the book begins with Germaine Greer’s explanation t hat she had wished this book would be obsolete by now but unfortunately it still has relevance. But I would argue this isn’t the entire truth. Although I can see some themes which are indeed relevant the book definitely needs an update as it lists abuse and discrimination which simply don’t occur anymore. If this were the only reference a woman or man had to create his/her views on the sexes the examples would probably lead them to an angry predisposition towards men. The sexist behaviour/thoughts we are left with now are more subtle than they were in the 70′s. One might argue there is a growing sexism against men which began with books such as these. This is begotten from the angry and cynical tones of the book and backed up by its cases of violence and abuse from men towards women Although it is undoubtedly true these abuses still occur, they are probably extreme cases which without the proper context given could breed men-hate in females.

Her stress upon demanding more than just legal rights of women but a fundamental shift in attitude is ‘right on’. Perhaps this is why Greer feels the book still cares relevance as now we have legal rights but our fundamental thoughts on sexual roles has not changed much, the way we express them has.

Although the book is an important part of our sexual history it would do us all much good to hear Greer’s up to date examples of sexism. I would also like to hear her take on how these views are pervading the minds of men in an equally negative way as it once only affected women.

Would recommend reading it if you’re into your feminist stuff but as a historical reference only.

The Goddess Light Within by Helena Nelson-Reed

I have been using my yoga practice to find the ‘spaces in-between’. The momental gaps between each breathe, the extra flexibility found in a muscle between thoughts.

This morning I felt peace between my thoughts about the past and plans about the future and I realised there is no point in anxiety or depression because they are both grounded in the past (depression) or the future (anxiety), neither of which ever exist in the present.

Today I ask you all to find yourself in the warrior pose and as you push between your front (future) and back (past) foot to find your balance realise that you can only truly hold yourself upright if you press equally between the two.

The world is mostly made of the spaces in-between and that is where you will find peace.

Namaste.

Capitalism. I went to see the protestors sat outside St. Pauls today. As I walked around I started reflecting and it went something like this.

I felt anger. I don’t think this way my own but the emotions emanating from the camp. I wondered to myself, these activists must be very angry with the world but is this really doing any good? It certainly has brought issues to the table but these protestors are a minority and they are operating outside of the system to change it. I believe the politicians will simply engage for publicity stunts if at all. I don’t think they will be taken seriously for they are one extreme of so many in a democracy. I believe that if a majority didn’t like capitalism it simply would not be able to survive.

But you may say, people aren’t well informed enough to make a knowledgeable decision. But, i ask you this: who is happier? The protestor on the street fighting against the system or the ignorant lay man operating within it?

The answer to this may be painful and inspire passion but isn’t happiness what life is all about?

I actually think that the st.pauls protest pushes the boundaries. By presenting the issue in a way that is so alien to most they don’t engage but alienate themselves. It is so much easier to comprehend unusual behaviour if we say to ourselves, ‘that murderer is a madman’ rather than face the reality that we all, as humans, potentially have the ability to do such things. In a similar way I believe the majority will see the protests and box those people in a way which explains their behaviour without having to reflect on a part of themselves.

I also think that if this subject is handled poorly by the protestors they may find themselves being cornered with legislation and creating more laws against their behaviour than they already had thereby decreasing our freedoms.

In England the law is that we can do anything we want unless otherwise stated. This freedom will be degraded the more we push our luck.

Maybe I’m a whimp, maybe I hate confrontation, maybe I am the ultimate pacifist.

The funny thing is my morals are not very different to these protestors but I don’t go making a big deal out of it because I don’t wanna cause trouble for myself, or attract attention.

Every time I pick herbs I am giving a massive middle finger to the pharmaceuticals and every time I forage for food im giving another to the supermarkets ripping off farmers. But I don’t think everyone is crap or stupid for not doing what I do. I am happy living the way i do and this is the only thing I can control. The way I feel.

You can remove my rights, bind me with laws, take away my freedoms but you can never take away my ability to be happy. If the world falls down around me, you’ll find me on a mountain laughing, and there’s nothing the system can do about it!

Welcome to the ultimate freedom.